The Counterattack: Oh Whyyy, Did You Have to Run Your Game On Me?

Even though she had her issues,
Marilyn Monroe was a female game master...
Every man loved her..and still do!!

Mariah Carey asked that question years ago, and I’m still searching for an acceptable answer. I’ve come to discover that I’ll probably never discover a precise, concrete reason why guys, as they say, “run their game” on us, so I’ve devised a plan that women can use to make men wonder the same thing about us. So, let me begin...

To create your own plan of attack, you must under all circumstances understand theirs (and by “theirs” I mean guys...). There are several methods and procedures men implement when courting, or gaming, women, but what I’ve noticed is that every single male game involves a couple of the same things. I will refer to my hypothetical male game runner as Joe, and the female one as Jill.

So it’s a Friday night, and Joe wants to go out and have a good time. Joe will most likely not be alone - no, not this guy, he’s gonna go out with his buddies, or “wingmen.” So it’s about 10:30, time to go out. They hit the bar around 10:40ish, mingling a little bit - and Joe spots Jill. He thinks she’s the sexiest thing on the planet and shares this observation with his pals. He’s gonna keep watching her - to understand who her friends are, what drinks she likes, and the way she interacts with people. Poor Jill is completely oblivious - or is she?? I’ll get back to the point in a bit, but Joe will most likely hang around her friends, speaking only to them, acknowledging her slightly. Joe will then acknowledge Jill with a statement like, “You always this quiet?” (She’s thinking “no, you’re not giving me a chance to speak because you’re talking to everyone else but me.” Instead, she says “No, I’m just tired.” Then, she’ll begin to actively seek his attention to prove to him that she’s not whatever mini-insult he threw at her.) Note: Guys will insult you to get your attention. I’ll admit, it is pretty effective, and girls sometimes don’t realize this. Anyway, once he’s insulted you, he’s gonna start ignoring you, likely flirting with girls right near you, and ones he would probably never be interested in to begin with. 

Alright, back to the hypo: Joe has Jill right where he wants, and he’ll probably buy her a drink by the end of the night, causing her to think “Oh, he’s a nice guy, I don’t even know why I was thinking he was ignoring me..” At this point, he is going to attempt to establish a “connection” with her, likely insinuating that they share a number of common interests. So, Joe’s gonna get her a little buzzed, helping diminish her inhibitions, and he’s thinking he’s gonna take her home and have his way with her. This is more than fair - I mean, Jill was choosing to have a drink with him, she chose to speak to a guy who was rude to her, and she will likely to choose to go home with him. It’s all consensual, and Joe may have manipulated the situation a little for Jill’s consent, but she’s still allowing it to happen if she ends up going home with him, giving Joe want he came after. 

Okay, so now I’m gonna re-do this hypo from Jill’s perspective, because she’s gonna run some game right back on him. So she’s at the bar, maybe a little ignorant that Joe is spying on her, and she sees him walking over. Note: Even if you don’t notice that a guy was spying, if he’s coming over, that’s proof enough that he had his eye out in your area. So now that you’re aware that this guy is aware of you, you know he’s a possible threat. Just chill and see what he does when he comes over. If he doesn’t acknowledge you, walk away. I cannot stress that enough. He’s being rude to get your attention, so you will end up giving him more. 

Jill realizes his game - Joe’s ignoring her, Joe’s flirting with everyone but her, and he continued to insult her. Jill chooses to leave the situation, causing Joe to think “Why is she rejecting me.” You see, Joe’s running his game with words, his presence, and his actions. Jill is smarter, she’s gonna run her game solely with her actions in this circumstance, simply by walking away. She’s removing her presence, and that’s what he’s been focused on all night. Now Jill has the power, she’s making him seek her attention, while Joe intended for her to seek his. 

Joe is thinking, alright how else can I get her attention? He will likely ask Jill, “Why are you so stand-offish?” Seriously, ladies, this is what Joe does- he will insult you to make you feel as though you need to prove that you are not whatever critique he provided. Jill is aware of this, so she doesn’t care about his insults. 

Regardless, Jill still thinks Joe’s really cute, and Joe thinks the same about Jill - otherwise they wouldn’t even be playing a game with one another. However, since Joe tried to run his game, Jill’s pissed because a guy who plays games is not only immature, but really frustrating. So Jill’s gonna give Joe a dose of his own medicine by flirting with one of his wingmen, Jack. They’re having a good conversation, and Joe is jealous. Joe is seeking Jill now. He’s thinking that he’s gonna have to try harder for her...

Which he will, because Jill only dates guys who aren’t in it just to get some. Now Joe’s thinking what am I gonna have to do to get her attention? I’ll tell you what he needs to do, he’s gonna have to take her out the good old fashioned way, treat her with respect, and show her that he’s actually a good guy. Joe is afraid to do this because there is a greater possibility of rejection, that’s why he and several men run game on women. The chance of rejection is much lower when you play a game, and none of us wanna get hurt, but the ones who don’t understand that rejection is a part of life are always the ones who play - yet, in so many ways, they’re always the ones who end up losing.