Represent the LBD: Does Every Girl Need at Least One?

A few of my LBDs...The picture doesn't
really capture their detailing as closely as I would've liked,
but, from left to right,
the one on the far left is a simple slip,
then there's my birthday dress,
then a simple bandage dress,
and a diagonally layered one with delicate lacy fabric!
...ENJOY.
How would you dress them up? ..or down.

Yes, every girl does need at least one. For those of you who don’t know, the LBD, otherwise referred to as the little black dress, is a necessity for every complete wardrobe. You can get them as cheap as they come so I’m certainly not encouraging anyone to shell out the big bucks for such a basic piece. Originally, I was gonna blog about my favorite basic essentials for fall and winter, but since the LBD is in a class by itself, I thought it deserved its own post.

The history of the LBD began in the early 1920’s during the fashion reign of CoCo Chanel, who incorporated these pieces in her collections. It later became popularized by other fashion icons like Audrey Hepburn, Jackie Kennedy, Princess Diana, and, of course, Betty Boop. 

The LBD is not only adored for its simplicity, but for its adaptability. This type of piece may be worn formally or extremely casually, depending on the way one chooses to dress it up. For me, I could wear one to class with my hair up, a cardigan and flats, with extremely conservative jewelry, and then if I wanted to go out later I could just throw on a pair of pumps, statement jewelry, and let my hair down. 

The LBD is so simple, yet such a complex fashion staple for its evident flexible nature, allowing women to discover a different look every time it is worn. In addition, though it is such a solid and plain color, it truly provides women a blank canvas upon which several looks are procured. The LBD is not just a dress, it is a tool of expression and stylistic artistry, proving one of the most timeless essentials in anyone’s wardrobe.

The Mechanics of Fashion Design: A Severely Unrecognized Art?

An original CoCo Chanel gown from 1938.

The cost to make a piece of clothing is probably worth less than 50 cents. A cotton shirt, for example, an incredibly generic piece of clothing, is worth just as much as one of Diane von Furstenburg’s signature rap tops, which usually run for hundreds of dollars, depending on which item. These are factual statements that cannot be argued- cotton is cotton is cotton is cotton.

However, a sheet of canvas usually runs for about $6, and it is likely worth even less. Same goes for paint; you can get it as cheap as you want (if you know where to look!). Imagine I have my hands on both, and I paint, well, a painting. Now, let’s add a little bit more to the mix- say I’m in the same room as Leonardo Da Vinci, he has access to the same products, and we’re both painting our lives away. Now, let me ask you a question- we both have access to the same canvas, paint, and tools, but whose final piece of art would be worth more, even though we both invested the same amount of time, money, and effort into our respective works?

I’m certainly hoping you didn’t choose me for this hypothetical question, because we all know Leonardo would blow me out of the water. The point I’m trying to make is this (and this is just my own definition of art-and I’m sure it varies from individual to individual): artwork, from a painting, piece of music, or fashion design, is valued according to the artist’s innovative ability to create work that has a timeless capacity to aesthetically arouse its audience (whether it’s an art critic, a music enthusiast, or, in my case, a shopaholic...) Anyway, in this brief blog post, I plan to argue that exceptional pieces of clothing are priced based on the mind of the designer or artist, rather than an overall interest in gaining a profit from, and this is hypothetically speaking, a %5,000 mark-up.

Of course, we all know a piece of clothing is just a piece of fabric worn to keep us covered, and designers know this too. The central difference is that designers (really, really good designers) view fashion design as an art, a science, and everything in between. The level of precision in, for example, an original CoCo Chanel gown is absolutely, mind-blowing-ly, disgustingly perfect. Every atomic particle in her dresses had a purpose, and every fiber in her dresses’ construction was destined to make every woman they embraced feel and look like the most beautiful person in the world. Her dresses made a statement, encouraging women to feel empowered by their femininity, especially during a time of such gender inequality. 

And just think about it, though the types of fabrics used in a Diane von Furstenburg piece are similar, if not the same as those used in a plain T-Shirt you could get down the street, her mind surpasses so many in her field. When we purchase true artistic pieces of clothing, we are thanking their creators for their mind, their vision, and their genius.

An Introduction Pt. II: Who Are the Masters of Hip Hop?

African Griots

I know many are anxiously awaiting my final anthological report on hip-hop, but before I shower my readers with my favored rap talents, I need to provide some of you with a bit more preliminary information. I would hate to overwhelm any of you, so, in this post, I will provide a brief history of rap’s development and its influences, as well as an understanding of my minute “experience” in this linguistically creative field.

Approximately two years ago, I was enrolled in an English course at JMU entitled “Oral Literature: The Evolution of Hip-Hop,” which introduced me to an incredible culture that had never really been recognized in an academic setting. Our final paper was similar to the current post I’m attempting to complete listing the “Masters of Hip-Hop,” but we were only required to include five artists in our mini-anthologies and we didn’t have a distinctly clear rubric by which we could evaluate the artists, like the one I’ve constructed. Despite this, through the course, I learned a great deal about the background and history of rap music, which I will share with you in a rather condensed version. (On a side note: I received an A- in the class, which I wasn’t entirely happy about...)

Rap music finds its roots in pre-colonial African tribes around the 14th century, in which stories, allegories, and songs were transferred solely in an oral manner alongside a drum or other musical instrument by griots, who were the African rockstars of their day. During the colonial period, however, and the establishment of slavery, the African story-telling tradition was brought over to the Americas and the Caribbean, with rhythmic traditions that are still present today as seen through other forms of music, like Reggae. Anyway, as the colonies grew, so did the need for slaves, especially in what we now know as the United States. 

Unfortunately, as disgusting as this piece of American history is, those held captive were able to find comfort during their work periods through a form of music known as call-and-response. This method of song consists of an expression which is confirmed, responded to, or negated by the next expression, and so on. A perfect example of a song with this call-and-response technique is the famed piece, “Wade in the Water,” which has proven itself a symbol of this horrific time period. (Listen to "Wade in the Water" Here!)

In keeping with the morose tones and rhythmic nature of call-and-response music, Blues music developed, which later developed into Jazz music around the U.S. Prohibition era, which was more lively, entertaining, and joyful than its musical predecessors. The poetics of jazz music strongly influenced “beat” writers through the 1970s, encouraging writers to utilize musical instruments during poetry readings and other public presentations of their work. Then during the late 70s and early 80s, the culture of hip hop was born.

This, my friends, is the history of rap music in a nutshell. I hope this provides some of you with a better understanding of hip-hop’s evolution and its century-old roots. Though I provided an incredibly compacted version of the growth of this particular industry, it is crucial that we recognize, appreciate, and preserve the ancestors of hip-hop because this musical form did not arise overnight, nor did it emerge out of thin air. Hip-Hop is a product of struggle, hardship, and brutality that was burdened upon innocent people who found relief through music and, without their suffering, this poetic form would not exist. So, please, next time you download a seemingly frivolous hip-hop song, keep its history in mind, and know that it is of the utmost importance that we protect, nurture, and conserve this form of poetics, as I hope to do with my anthology.

Listen to a Blues Song Here! "Bumble Bee" by Memphis Minnie

Listen to a Jazz Song Here! "Take the A Train" by Ella Fitzgerald and Duke Ellington

An Introduction: Who Are the Masters of Hip-Hop?

I. Introduction

Devising a list of 10 artists,
9 of which will remain a surprise,
whereas Slick Rick is a sneak peek :)

I am always searching for ways to improve my writing skills. When a situation occurs in which I’m unable to thoroughly and efficiently communicate my ideas through a pen, my MAC keyboard, or speech for that matter, and I’m in dire need of a little inspiration, I turn to art, literature, and, of course, music. Though I listen to a vast range of music daily, some of my favorite musical pieces stem from the world of hip-hop. Yes, whichever way you interpret it, as either hip-hop, rap, or “modern poetry,” I adore the stories and level of creativity rap artists incorporate in their music. I adore the magnificence of this particular industry and I adore the study of its unique, yet turbulent evolution. My level of intrigue with this form of oral literature has developed and grown over the past couple of years, and with the heightened accessibility of music through such networks as Spotify, 8-tracks, and Pandora, my fascination with rap has only multiplied.

In consequence of my enduring interest in rap, I have made the decision to enumerate my favorite hip-hop artists in a single, fairly brief anthology. Anthologies are defined as compilations of masterful works in a specific field, like literature or art for example. In this anthology, however, I’ve chosen to devise a list of artists, old and contemporary, who are worthy of academic, social, and cultural consideration, continually referencing a few of their original musical works. In more precise terms, the primary intent of this compressed anthology is to reconstruct the generic view of rap as nonsensical, maintaining that rap is a valid art form through an evaluated, categorized, graded, and ranked listing of distinguished hip-hop masters, with strong support from their varied musical pieces.

II. My Rapper’s Rubric

In order to successfully execute the central objective of this anthology, I have arranged a “Rapper’s Rubric” by which each included hip-hop artist is ranked, graded, and evaluated.

I have divided the rubric in three sections, with each section worth 15 points, totaling 45 possible points:

Lyrical Creativity in Artwork (15)

(5)- Originality of Poetics

(5)- Wordplay Skills

(5)- Retaliatory Capacity (In laymen's terms, the rap artist's acknowledgement of so-called "haters," which all legendary hip-hop masters include in at least some of their art.)

Influence of Artwork in: (15)

(5)- Our Society

(5)- Our Culture

(5)- Our Economy

Inclusion of Rhythmic, Stylistic, and Oratorical Influences from: (15)

(5)- Precedents of the Hip-Hop Genre (i.e. Blues, Jazz, etc.)

(5)- Other Rap Artists

(5)- Miscellaneous

A Skin Regimen: What’s Your Routine?

I have no shame.
This is my Lancome "Pure Empreinte Masque."
It's a purifying mineral mask with white clay.

Even though I’m only 22, I know, one day, my face will be wrinkly, withered, and irreversibly aged. Please don’t misconstrue my perspective on aging, because I believe wrinkles, in some ways, help tell a story about a woman’s life. When I was little, I loved sitting on my grandma’s lap and visually synthesizing the lines of her face, because I knew she earned them. So, to clarify my personal philosophy on old age, I definitely don’t associate beauty with youth, as our modern society does. I don’t believe that women over 60 are automatically aesthetically displeasing, because none of us are getting any younger, so I have no right to play critic.

However, I do believe in taking care of my skin, so I’m dedicating this particular post to the value of skin care, especially for my fellow-females. I definitely try and take care of my skin everyday, but, today, I’m changing my negligent ways and constructing an actual skin regimen that I can strictly adhere to, and one that you may embrace too, if you like. Also, I’m getting really sick of wearing makeup all the time- so I want my skin to look naturally healthy.

Eloise Rose’s Face Regimen

Prefacing Rules for Regimen:

1. Wash face twice a day, once every morning (should be first priority after waking up) and every night before bed. 

*May wash face more as needed, i.e. after eye-brow waxes, gym, etc.

1. Never go to sleep with makeup on, especially if this circumstance is easily avoidable.
2. After every face-wash, always, always, always moisturize!!!

The Regimen:

Morning Routine

1. Immediately after waking up, wash face with skin-cleanser.
2. After washing face, apply astringent, then toner.
3. Moisturize.
4. Apply makeup, if needed.

Evening Routing

1. Use eye makeup remover to remove any mascara, eyeshadow, liner, etc.
2. Use towelette to remove other make up.
3. Wash face.
4. Apply astringent, then toner.
5. Moisturize.
6. Apply other skin cream over possible or potential breakouts. Leave this on overnight.

So this is my routine from now on. I’m planning to wear a face mask approximately once a week as well. Also, invest in skin-care products that work well for you and your own, unique facial chemistry. You don’t need to spend a fortune on these products, but they’re definitely worth the purchase!

Okay, well thank you for reading! Also, do you have any skin-care routines as well?? Let me know!

Dating Dilemma Pt. II: What Constitutes as Boyfriend Material?

Pepé Le Pew, I'm sure he could certainly
benefit from some of my advice...

Though I’ve never had a real, live boyfriend, my lack of a genuine romantic relationship has given me time to ponder, observe, and question that magic, invisible wall between men and women, especially when it comes to love. I know what girls want and, since I am one, I can give my male readers some serious advice on how to become boyfriend material. Yes, this post is geared towards the guys, but I would absolutely love some input from my female readers as well, because no one knows what we look for in a boyfriend better than us. And, since I have a strict open-door policy when it comes to my blog, I would love feedback from some of my male readers who are looking for, or have found, that special guy in their lives (I’m currently working on dating advice for my gay audience, so I would love as many opinions as possible. Though this particular post is directed more toward a heterosexual audience, I could still use your advice on what makes a guy boyfriend material!) Anyway, especially in my generation, many boys I know have no clue how to approach relationships, so please accept my guidance because, and I say this with all due respect, it’s time to take off your 14-year-old little boy cap and step your game up.

Only toddler pic of me on my computer I could find.
I really wanted to showcase my
Pebbles Flinstone halloween costume, but that pic was
nowhere to be found.
I had a bone in my hair and everything...

Okay, I’m gonna set up a hypothetical situation, it goes as follows: you see a disgustingly sexy girl that you don’t know at a bar, you really want to approach her but you have no idea how to get her attention. Don’t worry, I’m not going to discourage you from speaking to her, but since this is your first interaction with her, please don’t play the asshole who just wants to get some. If you really want to become a boyfriend, you have to give up these behaviors and approach every girl as if they were mere friends, innocent until proven guilty. If you’ve been a player for too long and you’re really making efforts to find that special girl, I have devised a secret test that you can implement when approaching women. Every girl you meet, see, or interact with, especially within the 18-25 year age range, were once little 5 year old girls learning how to ride a bike, playing jumprope on the pavement, and eating cake batter any chance they could (which I still do...). My point is this, when you approach a girl for the first time that you genuinely want to be with, don’t say a word that would be inappropriate for her inner-5-year-old to hear. I’m not saying speak to her like she’s a baby, but make sure you approach her in an incredibly neutral, non-threatening way. If you can’t handle us when we’re just toddlers, then you don’t deserve us at any age, proving that you still have work to do in the boyfriend department.

Okay, now we’re moving past the initial interaction and both of you are going on a date (which you better pay for- and I don’t mean to sound like a gold-digger, because everyone knows I’m not, and I’ll always offer to pay my share of the meal, but it’s such a turn off when guys don’t pay for the meal- especially on the first date). Anyway, if she green-lighted a date, she’s saying it’s okay for you to be less guarded and show her more of who you really are. Her inner-child isn’t there anymore, and it’s okay to crack a few jokes here and there. We love humor, personality, intellect, and interesting conversation- so, if you can provide this on a date, she’ll likely come back for more. Make sure you listen, listen, listen to what she has to say, and this shouldn't be a problem if you really want to be with this girl. 

A huge turn on is a guy who can actually resist temptation. If you’re willing to go to any lengths to get some, you clearly have very poor, low standards. A girl with self-respect will not want to date you, especially if the only girls willing to satisfy you are sleaze balls. If you want a really awesome girlfriend, you cannot have any romantic or physical links to anybody else, she has to be the only girl in your eyes. Also, please don’t settle for girls that make you question whether or not there are real feelings present between you two. If you have to question the way you feel for a girl, it’s more than likely a situation that will go down hill. You will know when the time is right to settle, and you will find someone who is absolutely perfect for you. So break ties sooner rather than later, so you can have your own peace of mind back before you're actually ready to search for the real deal.

Another type of guy I cannot stand is the couch potato. I’m not saying he has to make all the money in the world, because I can totally do that for myself, but I’m just saying it’s important for guys to have passion and drive in their life, no matter their chosen career. So, please, get off your butt and do something.

Reliability, generosity, awareness, loyalty, and the ability to commit are also qualities we look for in guys. Another quality we appreciate is the capability to communicate your true feelings for us. Even if it seems as though the time isn’t truly right, or you have a fear of rejection, what’s the worst that could happen? If there is a girl who is worth it, you will tell her how you feel- even if you have to walk across mountains to do it. You will make sure she knows, so don’t play games because we definitely don’t have time for that. We also like guys who respect us, not pressuring us to get physical sooner than we want to. Even though sex is important in any romantic relationship, it’s nice to know that you don’t want to be with us only for our bodies, especially if you want to become boyfriend material.

Okay, so I think I’ve covered the basics. If there are any qualities or traits of the quintessential boyfriend that I may have left out, please feel free to offer your feedback! Thanks again for reading!

P.S. If you embody all of the aforementioned qualities, all you need to do now is wear deodorant, take showers, find clothes that fit, and brush your teeth/hair and you’ll be well on your way to becoming boyfriend material!! Now go get her!

Saw My Psychic Again Today: What’s in Your Destiny?

"The Crystal Ball"
by John William Waterhouse (1902)

So, I saw my psychic again today and I was absolutely blown away by the accuracy of her reading. Last time I saw her, she requested that I come back around my birthday and, since it was only a couple of days ago, she was able to gather more insight regarding my present and future circumstances. Apparently, in astrology, new opportunities and blessings arrive around one’s birthday, so psychics are able to draw more information and, therefore, provide a keener reading of one’s destiny.

We spoke about my family, friends, career, money, and love life. The first piece of information she told me, like last time, was that I have definite psychic energy, and I need to listen to it more, comparing it to a “GPS.” She then told me I’m “very intelligent,” and that’s where things got interesting...

I told her that I’m starting school this thursday for my paralegal certificate, and she told me it was a step in the right direction, but she asserted that I will become a businesswoman one day. She said I have very strong business qualities (which I’m sure I got from my father) and that I will be working with “very important people” internationally. She understood, without me saying a word, that the ability to provide for myself is very important to me and that I don’t need to worry about $ as much as I do because I will definitely be able to “stand on my own two feet” when I’m older. 

She then began talking about my friends, telling me that I have great relationships with many people around me, and I’m going to make many more this year, which got me pretty excited. She also told me that when I’m in a good mood people are drawn to my positivity, making people I know around me happy. When I’m in a bad mood, however, I’m a nightmare to be around- and my family can vouch for that...

We then began talking about my, um, “interesting” love life for a while, especially in comparison to last time. I really have no clue who this person is, but she told me that there was a particular boy in my life who was pretty interested in me a while ago and I didn’t acknowledge his feelings because I was “preoccupied” and I wasn’t fully aware of how strongly he felt for me. But he became “preoccupied” when I showed interest in him. Apparently he has lighter eyes than me, but I still have no idea who this person is because I’ve had quite a few situations like this, and I really don’t want to read to much into it. Anyway, then she said that me and this individual have a connection, but timing has not been on our side for us to have an actual relationship. Then she said he was in no condition to be a boyfriend right now, affirming that he’s a huge partier and in a highly tempting atmosphere. If I had a dime for every guy I’ve had connections with who I could apply this to...

Anyway, she said we’ll be on neutral ground over Thanksgiving providing us the opportunity to determine if there is still “energy” between us. I guess I’ll figure out who it is by then, but I am not going to stress over it.

Then she started talking about other little flings I’ve had, which was actually incredibly funny because she was more than accurate about those, but I don’t want to give too much away about that...

And just as I began to feel a little deflated about my relationship prospects, she said that next month I will meet a potential love who I haven’t had any close communication with, but he lives in my area. She said that he’s very attractive, tall, older than me with light eyes, and has a keen interest in writing, music, and art. She then said he’s very calming, sweet, and down to earth, and I won’t feel anxious or betrayed by him.

She then said that she saw marriage in my future and I should be wifey’d up in 5 years, when I’m about 27, and she said I won’t get a divorce. Apparently, I’m also going to have children and she said that I am going to be a very “kind and compassionate” mom.

She told me that I’m a very genuine person and I’m not phony in any way. She knows that if I don’t like someone, I definitely will not act like I do, but she made it clear that I have a good soul and energy. 

So, that’s a summary of our session today, and if you ever need answers, advice, or guidance, this woman is the person to go to. She is the real deal, so if you would like to speak with a genuine psychic, please contact me via e-mail or Facebook and I can give you her information- and, as always, thanks for reading!!