I've had this blog for quite a while now and, after much reflection, I think it's time to call it quits. Not to worry, I'm still going to write my little rap anthology, as I promised, but I do not have the strength for "The Open Book" like I used to. It's taken such a personal toll and I just cannot do it anymore- Looking back, though I don't believe in "regrets" just learning experiences, there is really so much I would've done differently but, nevertheless, what's done is done and I couldn't be happier with the following the site has acquired. When I first started, I was a little disappointed with the number of page views so I knew I needed to do something a little drastic- so I wrote a little blog post (people who've read me, or secretly read me, from the beginning should know what I'm talking about) which really got it started- though I never went viral, I was getting, at minimum, hundreds of page views per post. Though this attention was awesome, it still had its downfalls- When you put yourself out there, the people who love you make you feel on top of the world, while those who don't make you feel like you shouldn't be alive. To me, it's really not worth it. Also, another facet of any author's writing that I appreciate is honesty. I have to filter myself so much now that it's become a little superficial (I mean, who wants to read about outfits everyday?? I mean, personally, I love it, but it can get a little boring...) and I just can't write like that anymore. (...At least I have a journal that I can put whatever the hell I want in w/o any second guesses- maybe I can publish it one day and make lots of $$...who knows.) In all seriousness though, I'm not famous and I don't even wanna be famous. I can't deal with criticism and I can't deal with negativity. My happiness is just not a sacrifice I'm willing to make. But, to those who love me and to those who hate me, and I say this in all sincerity, thank you for reading :)
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